I was having a conversation this week with a friend about sharks and it took me back to a family holiday we had to Australia in 2012. Together with my husband, daughter (aged 12 at the time) and son (aged 10 at the time), we took a trip out to the Ningaloo reef one day. Ningaloo Marine Park, just off the Exmouth coast, has crystal clears waters that harbour the world’s largest fringing reef swarming with colourful corals and the most amazing fish. It was the most fantastic sight I’d ever seen. Snorkelling gear on, we entered the clear water that is so shallow with a lovely little current that gently pushed us along the water’s surface as we ogled the incredible sights below us – corals, turtles, tropical fish, mantra rays and then…a shark! Swimming directly below us…
At this point, and probably for the first time in my life I totally understood fear and real fear. I could completely and utterly lose it …or not. Actually, we all kept amazingly calm, until the shark passed us all safely and then we all jumped to the surface screaming!
What did come out of this experience was the choice element and how we choose to respond to situations. I’m pretty sure that fear may always be around ready to pounce on us when we least expect it, but we can choose whether we engage it and allow it to prevent us from doing anything or not.
The issue is that we’ve actually made being fearful a habit. We only have to switch on the news and we’re pumped full of stories that fill us with dread and fear of the world. We’re taught to play it safe and not take risks, follow the crowd in our mundane 9-5 job, stay in the comfort zone and it’s become such a habit we don’t even know we’re doing it half the time.
Fear lives in the future. The feelings you feel of being scared and afraid are real but the fear itself is made up in our heads - what we’re afraid will happen has not even happened yet! How many times do you say ‘What if this happens or that happens’? the reality is we don’t even know that what we fear is going to happen and if it does is it really that scary (the paradox of this is you get what you focus on, so the more you focus on what you don’t want to happen, guess what will happen…!)
Do you want to go through life worrying about what MIGHT happen?
Try looking at a scary or fearful event from the past. Now look back on it. Is it really that terrifying now? Can you bring up any scary feelings about it? Go on give it a go. I bet you can’t bring up anything. If I look back to the shark event, can I bring up those feelings of fear now? Absolutely not. Now I can look back on that event and remember what a fantastic adventure it was and how lucky I was able to swim with a shark in its own environment. Not many people can say they’ve done this. As you face any new challenge or opportunity, just use this ‘rear view mirror’ way of looking at it. No matter how scary that next step might be in the moment, you know when you look back on it, you may not even remember what it was you were fearful of and it will just fade into your memories. Try visualising your challenges from the future from a place of success and they will lose their power over you.
Our fears are our greatest waste of time and energy.
Why not come along to my live weekend event on 8th and 9th December to rid yourself of any fear emotions from the past, grab some tips to remove the fear from the future as well as clearing up any other negative emotions and self-limiting beliefs.
This powerful, life changing, transformational workshop takes place at The Hub Touchwood, Solihull, B91 3GJ. For just £247 for the weekend including lunch, refreshments, and workbook. Check out the full details here https://www.dare2succeed.co.uk/make-2019-your-most-fantastic-yet